Title: A Collection of TOD Nursery Rhymes
Author: SassyInkPen (7/2002)
Fandom: Tour of Duty
Pairing: I lost track
Rating: PG-13 to NC-17
Part: 1/1
Archive: Yes, please.

Warnings: M/M sex, language, unsanctioned use of nursery rhymes.

Summary: Fairy Tale Challenge response - here's some TOD nursery rhymes

Disclaimer: The characters and Tour of Duty belong to Zev Braun Productions and New Line. No money was made from this story. No copyright infringement intended - just a true appreciation of a fine set-up.



A Collection of TOD Nursery Rhymes
By SassyInkPen

****

ORIGINIAL:
There was an old woman who lived in a shoe;
She had so many children she didn't know what to do.
She gave them some broth without any bread;
Then whipped them all soundly and put them to bed.

TOD:
There was a lieutenant who lived in a hootch;
He had a new roommate he wasn't allowed to boot.
He fired some bullets alongside the bed;
But really would rather have aimed at John's head.

****

ORIGINAL:
Mary had a little lamb,
It's fleece was white as snow;
And everywhere that Mary went,
The lamb was sure to go.

It followed her to school one day,
That was against the rule;
It made the children laugh and play
To see a lamb at school.

TOD:
Johnny had a metal bird
That in the sunlight glistened.
He blared rock music where he went,
And everybody listened.

He flew into the hot LZ's
To save the guys from harm;
And they would cheer and buy him beer,
Because they nearly bought the farm.

****

ORIGINAL:
Little Jack Horner
Sat in a corner,
Eating his Christmas pie;
He put in his thumb,
And pulled out a plum,
And said, "What a good boy am I!"

TOD:
Private Will Griner
Had a big shiner,
He got after making a pass.
He saw John McKay
Bending over one day,
And ran a hand over his ass.

****

ORIGINAL:
Polly put the kettle on,
Polly put the kettle on,
Polly put the kettle on,
We'll all have tea.

Sukey take it off again,
Sukey take it off again,
Sukey take it off again,
They've all gone away.

TOD:
Myron put your clothes on,
Myron put your clothes on,
Myron put your clothes on,
Johnny's at the door.

Zeke take them off again,
Zeke take them off again,
Zeke take them off again,
It was a false alarm.

****

ORIGINAL:
Little Bo-peep has lost her sheep,
And doesn't know where to find them;
Leave them alone and they'll come home,
Dragging their tails behind them.

TOD:
A Sergeant named Zeke, found he could not sleep
And wanted something to soothe him.
His lieutenant was young and fairly well hung,
And always knew how to use him.

So out he went, to Goldman's tent
To see if he could get laid.
Although Myron was home, he wasn't alone,
His bed was already made.

****

ORIGINAL:
The Queen of Hearts
She made some tarts,
All on a summer's day;
The Knave of Hearts
He stole the tarts,
And took them clean away.
(etc)

TOD:
A nasty tart
Stole L-T's heart,
Much to Zeke's dismay.
This little tart
Had made a start
To hold L-T in sway.

But Zeke - he prayed
For L-T's days
To be his and his alone.
So Zeke - he played,
Til L-T strayed,
And left the tart at home.

****

ORIGINAL:
Jack and Jill 
Went up the hill,
To fetch a pail of water;
Jack fell down
And broke his crown,
And Jill came tumbling after.

TOD:
Dan and Doc
Lay on a cot,
Naked and writhing and moaning.
Dan grabbed Doc
Around his cock,
And stroked him until he was groaning.

Then up Dan got,
And sat on Doc,
And rode him like he was a pony.
Soon Doc came,
Dan did the same,
Cause he loved to see Doc get so horny.

****


ORIGINAL:
Wee Willie Winkie runs through the town,
Upstairs and downstairs in his nightgown,
Rapping on the window, crying through the lock,
Are all the children in their beds, it's past eight o'clock.

TOD:
Private Willie Griner runs through the hootch,
Frustrated and horny, grabbing guys to smooch.
Kissing Marcus Taylor, planting one on Doc,
But if he tries to kiss Purcell, he's probably gonna get clocked.

****

ORIGINAL:
Hey diddle, diddle, the cat and the fiddle,
The cow jumped over the moon;
The little dog laughed to see such sport,
And the dish ran away with the spoon.

TOD:
Hey John McKay, the Sergeant's gone away, 
And Myron's alone in your room.
So if you want to get naked and have a good time,
You'd better make a move soon.

****

ORIGINAL:
Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater,
Had a wife and couldn't keep her;
Put her in a pumpkin shell,
And there he kept her very well.

TOD:
Myron, Myron, keeps on tryin'
Wants Zeke alone, and in bed lyin'
If he had the sergeant there,
He'd strip clothes til they both were bare.
Then on his knees, he'd start in sucking,
Til Zeke begged him to switch to fucking.
Sitting on the sergeant's cock,
He'd fuck him hard, and never stop,
Til Zeke screamed out the L-T's name,
And Myron, dazed, would do the same.

****

ORIGINAL:
Sing a song of sixpence,
A pocket full of rye;
Four and twenty blackbirds,
Baked in a pie.
(etc)

TOD:
The boys are in the barracks,
Playing nasty games.
They've all become so horny,
They might go up in flames.

Danny's on the top bunk,
His head is in Doc's lap.
Doc reaches round the other way
And gives Dan's ass a slap.

Taylor sees them playing there
And stands next to the bed.
Doc tells him to spank Dan's ass...
He does, until it's red.

Danny starts to cry and wail,
Til Griner makes him stop.
William helps Dan off the bed,
While Taylor stays with Doc.

Griner lays poor Danny down
And kisses where it hurts.
Now Danny's cock is aching hard,
He's not sure which is worse.

Zeke and Myron walking by,
Hear noises from inside.
Myron starts to worry now,
But Zeke assures him they are fine.

"Relax, L-T," he tells his friend,
"They're just blowing off some steam.
Come with me into my hootch,
I'll show you what I mean."

Zeke takes his hand and leads the way,
While Myron slowly follows.
The L-T's heart is beating fast,
And he can hardly swallow.

Once inside, Zeke shuts the door,
And tackles Myron's buttons.
Tossing clothing here and there,
Til no one's wearin' nothin'

Zeke grabs the boy and kisses hard,
Then pulls him into bed.
Myron's overcome with lust,
Blood pounding in his head.

He grabs a hold of Zeke's hard cock
And eagerly starts licking.
He never knew how fun this was,
Or what he had been missing.

The two of them are writhing 'round;
Before too long they're fucking.
Then Zeke pins him to the bed,
And Myron can't help bucking.

He throws his arms around Zeke's neck
And tosses back his head.
He comes real hard and so does Zeke,
Who collapses on the bed.

Myron lights a cigarette,
And leans against his friend.
"I can't believe how good this was,
We'll have to play again."

****

The End